Because you want it to, the more you try to get away from it, the worse it gets.
Lets Normalise anxiety, lets see it for what it is so we can work with it.
I understand its frustrating, we get frustrated with ourselves, we wish we could just get over it, people around us say we should just get over it. The problem with this is, when we resist it, we don't see it for what it is and we cant begin to work with it. "Just getting over it", is not compatible with the reality of our physiological responses to a perceived threat.
When we experience anxiety, we perceive a threat. when we perceive a threat our body literally adjusts to manage that threat.
- It pumps adrenaline into the blood stream
- Blood is pushed to the heart and other vital organs
- pulse rate and blood pressure goes up
- your breath more rapidly
- you become on high alert
Everything speeds up to manage this threat. Your body is doing all of this on your behalf without your awareness. It isn't a matter of conscious choice, it is happening. You will then, fight, flight or freeze. It is a perfectly normal response and it is acting because it believes it is protecting you. This is the reality.
When we accept this reality we can begin to understand and work with our anxiety. We can equip ourselves with tools to interrupt our body's natural response.
we can come to understand what the anxiety means to us, we can explore the perceived threat and we can find ways to move towards those fears in a way that feels safe.
Lets start building tool boxes in response to this reality, lets start with a little self compassion...
Considering this reality.. How can you be kinder to yourself, what can you do to maintain a sense of safety whilst also moving towards your goals that feel scary to you ? Is there a middle ground, a smaller step? is there anything that brings a sense of safety? a calming smell? a soothing object? a calming sound? a place? explore what brings a feeling of safety and calmness to your days.
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